How to Handle my boyfriend who is ignoring me?
Being ignored by your boyfriend is not a good feeling. You will feel alone and you ask yourself whether you have done wrong to him. But you need to look the situation objectively even if you feel you are not doing wrong. What might the cause of his behaviour and does it related to you, e.g. Is he simply busy in his work? If the situation is persist in long time like days and you already feel not comfortable abut the situation. Then you need to bring up the issue up in a calm manner. Ask him the reason why he is ignoring you and tell him how you feel about it.
First of all, you need to know there are 2 primary reasons why man ignoring you:
- Your boyfriend needs time or space to think
This is usually happens after you have a fight with him and you mention to him something that makes him not happy. Most of men will go away and have time alone to reflects what has just happened. A good man will think how to solve the problem, they usually don’t like to sit in the same room and talk about problems like women do ( women usually like to talk about the problem face to face and look for solution together). On opposite way, man usually think about the problem and then to come up with a solution and talk about the solution later.
If the problem is quite big, perhaps it will take him longer to think about the issue. Perhaps it will take a couple of weeks, or even a month. On this stage, he is usually not talks too much( quiet scary though..lol). During this time, man usually ignoring you and doesn’t want talk to you. If you try to reach him through text but he is not reply, you must still in positive attitude.
- It is easer for him to not response
After few days of fight, you may want to reach out to him. You send him a number of messages, you are little to needy, a little to demanding and you send a messages that not require an answer or you send a long messages that are not clear what you are trying to say. That is the maybe the reason he is not responding and ignoring you.
If he is a quite big issue, he doesn’t know how to response you and delaying your messages. He may need take more time to digest your messages. To make a proper answer, especially if he really likes you then he need more careful with his response.
Here are how to handle this situation:
- You need give him time to cool down his emotional feeling under control before he speaks to you again. So all you can do is tell him you are here when he is ready to talk again
- After the situation is calm, maybe couple of days, try to meet him. Ask him how is he feeling and listen while he talks. Pay attention what he will talks about to get understand the whole picture. If you not happy with the answer, don’t give him a silent treatment again. It will make things worse, you need to open a communication.
- You can talk about your own feelings like ” I know you are still angry with me, but when you are not reply my text I got worried and make me feel sad and anxious”. Then you can go into details about the problem with calm manner and solve problem attitude.
- If you feel you already make mistake and makes your boyfriend angry, say sorry to him (really sincerely apologize) like I am sorry I already make you made because of this problem.
- Try to resolve the issue together until it becomes not a problem anymore. You can make a suggestion if both of you start a fight again in the future. Like give a space around 10-30 minutes in separate room and write down on paper about things that you and your boyfriend fight about, then read them together.
- Encourage him to tell you everything if something bothering him
Many people hide their problems when they have an issue, this is also happens in relationship. If your boyfriend having trouble to say something about his feeling. You can encouraging him by saying ” if there anything you want to talk about? do you have a problem?, please be honest with me” then you can listen him carefully what he is trying to say.
- Evaluate your relationship if don’t have a progress
If you already talk nice about the problem and already giving many ways to solve the problem, but your boyfriend still give you a cold shoulder, maybe you need to think to end this relationship,
Another reason why your boyfriend is ignoring you because he doesn’t love you anymore ( I know this is painful to hear). You need to ask yourself a question whether you are okay being treated like this? Is this the type of behaviour you are deserve from your boyfriend? you deserve better man that really love you and won’t think twice by ignoring you. Don’t think to chase him again, close the book.
Remember you are a valuable person and you are the same level as man to have a happy ending in romance. Never position yourself lower than your boyfriend or you will be suffer on that relationship.
If this happens to you, it might a good news because he is showing you his true color(be thankful). He is not making you his priority and you should not spending your precious time with him again. I know it will hurt you but it just temporary. After times you will thankful on your decision by break up with him, you deserve with a better man who love you the way you are, the one who treating you like you are a princess, respect you.
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